Will Rogers

“We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.”

“Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln.”

“What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.”

“Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation.”

“So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn the other fellow for doing what we are doing every day, only in a different way.”

“The United States never lost a war or won a conference.”

“The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.”

“If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.”

“Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.”

“The fellow that can only see a week ahead is always the popular fellow, for he is looking with the crowd. But the one that can see years ahead, he has a telescope but he can't make anybody b...”

“Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due.”

“Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.”

“I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.”

“I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate...”

“Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.”

“Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.”

“Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.”

“The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.”

“Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like.”

“There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.”