“I am writing a book about the Crusades so dull that I can scarcely write it.”

“An institute run with such knavish imbecility that if it were not the work of God it would not last a fortnight.”

“Just as there is nothing between the admirable omelet and the intolerable, so with autobiography.”

“Every major question in history is a religious question. It has more effect in molding life than nationalism or a common language.”