“Quite often, we're swamped with friends. My house is known as Hotel Morrissey, which is quite handy whenever I need dog-sitters for Tiggy. She's my tiny little rescue dog, the size of both o...”

“I went to a Turkish hairdresser, and they burned the hair off my ears with a lit taper. They just put the burning candle near your ears and you hear the hair being burned away. And the smell...”

“I don't even like sitting in a taxi or on the tube when I've got a nicely ironed shirt on - I can feel the creases starting. I was taught to iron in the children's home I lived in - along wi...”

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me...”

“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching, Love like you'll never be hurt, Sing like there's nobody listening, And live like it's heaven on earth.”

“So many books, so little time.”

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”