“I had always been told by my parents, not implicitly told, but every inference was that Britain was the hub of the universe.”

“When I was presenting 'Animal Hospital,' the grey started to creep into my beard and moustache. I used my wife's mascara to darken it.”

“I draw the line at filth and crude language. It seems to be an excuse for not being funny.”

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me...”

“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching, Love like you'll never be hurt, Sing like there's nobody listening, And live like it's heaven on earth.”

“So many books, so little time.”

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”