Jean Kerr

“I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?”

“The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.”

“If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation.”

“Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.”

“Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he becomes polite.”

“Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself-like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.”