Al Yankovic

“Some people want to advertise their weirdness, and spread it out, that's not me.”

“I'm very analytical, I'm very precise.”

“I write and write and write, and then I edit it down to the parts that I think are amusing, or that help the storyline, or I'll write a notebook full of ideas of anecdotes or story points, a...”

“I think that nerds, if you want to call them that, have only gotten more hip and assimilated into the culture.”

“What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist's performance on whether or not they had a good seat?”

“Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.”

“When I go to my live shows it's often a multigenerational audience, a family bonding experience.”

“I was a huge fan of 'Mad' magazine when I was 11, 12, 13 years old. I'd scour used bookstores trying to find back issues, and I'd wait at the newsstand for a new issue to come out. My life r...”

“When I was a kid, I thought I was going to be an architect, because when I was 12 years old I had a guidance counselor that convinced me that that was the best career choice for me.”

“I make charts of songs that are good candidates, good targets, so to speak. Then I try to come up with ideas for parodies. And 99% of those ideas are horrible.”

“I'm watching the charts every week and hoping something will pop into my head.”

“How can you get bored if the audience is cheering and laughing at something you're doing?”

“There are probably a few library fines I haven't paid yet, but I'm a pretty clean-cut guy overall.”

“I don't really look at myself as the kind of person who craves attention, but I've never been to therapy so there's probably a lot of stuff about myself that I don't know.”

“Pop culture's gotten much more disposable.”

“I've learned how to use my spam filter pretty effectively.”

“So I'm one of the few celebrities that got to do a repeat performance on 'The Simpsons,' which I'm very flattered by.”

“One of my pet peeves is that sometimes the talents of my band get overlooked because, and it was the same problem that Frank Zappa had, with a lot of groups that use humor, people don't real...”

“My hobbies just sort of gradually became my vocation.”

“Like, I have had moments, which I think most people have, where you'll be watching TV, and it'll be interrupted by some tragic event, and you'll actually find yourself thinking, 'I don't wan...”