Jen Lancaster

“I'm not thin, but I'm strong - plus my balance is such that I can navigate a flight of stairs with a basket of laundry and a stack of Pottery Barn catalogs, vaulting over cat-and-dog hurdles...”

“My friend created an iPhone app that locates Vienna Beef products across the country. Personally, I came hardwired with an internal GPS that instinctively points me toward coffee shops, cupc...”

“You know how it's almost impossible for kids to not say what they think? That's me. I have to make the conscious effort to be situationally appropriate.”

“Our citizens never hesitate to take sides against one another, whether it's Democrats versus Republicans, Coke drinkers opposed to Pepsi enthusiasts or Yankee loyalists against Red Sox afici...”

“I guess my most prized pop culture possession is a signed first edition of the book 'Fight Club' by Chuck Palahniuk.”

“I married a man who isn't afraid to wash a dish, scrub a toilet, or have his unibrow waxed into submission by a licensed professional.”

“There's nothing fun about stuff like estate planning, getting mammograms, or talking to a guy about long term disability insurance, but do it anyway. Trust me, the stress of not having done...”

“You can't all of a sudden go to sleep one night and wake up Martha Stewart. It's bit by bit by bit.”

“I didn't want to turn into Martha Stewart. I wanted to turn into a more organized, more gracious me. And that truly has happened.”

“Now with social media, people essentially come into my living room, my virtual living room, and tell me everything that is wrong with me.”

“I think people tend to be very myopic and they don't understand how their actions impact others.”

“To be clear, I'm not opposed to apps; I just want them to be geared to my lifestyle. I don't need a virtual NASCAR racing app, but I'd certainly appreciate one that stopped my husband from p...”

“When you think about a drill sergeant, a drill sergeant expects you to perform your best, and if you don't, they're going to stay on you until you do.”

“The first 'Wii Fit' games I tried were the slalom and ski jumping. I believe my spectacular failures here had more to do with the board resting on thick carpet than my shoddy balance.”

“I've always been able to cook Italian food. That's in my blood because I'm half Sicilian.”

“I didn't understand the Kindle's true value until I finished an e-book on the beach. In sixty seconds - and without benefit of pants - I had brand-new reading material at my fingertips.”